Family reunions, a resource for strengthening families

Family cookout. Submitted by Antoinette Harrell.

Family reunions, a resource for strengthening families
By Anoinette Harrell, Genealogist

We have always had family reunions.  Every Sunday the family, aunts, uncles, and cousins, would come together for dinner.  They would talk about how to help family members who were sick, plan activities, or divide up work that needed to be done on the farm.  Lately, we are only getting together once or twice a year.

I remember every Sunday thirty or forty first cousins used to all get together.  Chicken were killed and prepared.  Pies and cakes were baked.  They would sit on the porch and visit with each other.  This is what I refer to when I say that it is the past that shapes the present and the present that shapes the future.  We come together to honor our ancestors, spend time with those who are here with us, and build a future for the rising generations.

Family members have moved away in search of jobs that have taken them all over the United States.  At one time receiving a long distance phone call was a big thing in the family.  Everyone would gather around the phone waiting to speak to the family member on the phone. Now  internet technology has brought us closer.

Those who passed away in our time become ancestors.  They were in their forties and fifties, and we thought they were old.  Now we are the elders, and our children are looking to us to guide them. Family reunions should have a council of elders to mandate family matters and family business.

Family Reunion. Submitted by Antoinette Harrell.

Family reunions could become a business.  A reunion is a perfect place where dues can be paid and funds generated for committees to carry out family business such as:

• scholarship committee
• cemetery committee
• elderly care committee: Instead of putting family members in nursing homes, someone always took care of family.  Perhaps they need help paying for medicine or need a place to stay.

An education committee could assist family members with applying for grants, preparing for college, or resume writing.  They also could offer internships. When we work to empower our families, that's freedom.  We need to recreate the village. A lot can come from family reunions.  The family can plan community service activities, visit historical sites, restore a cemetery, set up a community resource center, support family members as they serve on a foreign mission.

The family was always the primary source of support for extended family members.  My mother, Isabel  Harrell Cook, had a cousin who had special needs.  Mandy Wheat's daughter took him in. That was just the way they did it.  It was not always about the money back then because they had so little.

They bartered, and they used money mostly for the things they could not barter.  For example my mother, Isabel Harrell Cook, allowed Henry Wheat to put his cows in the family pasture.  In return, he shared fresh vegetables, and when he slaughtered a cow, he shared portions of meat with her.

Each segment of the reunion is fun, but equally or more important are those things that would empower the family and build a stronger family community. When you empower a family, you can definitely build a stronger community.

Our families are rich with talented young people.  We have doctors, nurses, educators, business owners, farmers, and much more.  Having a family business directory makes available resources that will inspire family members to patronize each others services.  This is what economic freedom is all about.

One mistake we as genealogists make is that we do not live in the present in the family.  We are too busy researching the past and do not spend enough time with family members who are living in our time. We are looking for yesterday's information and not collecting enough of today's information right around us.  We pass up opportunities to connect and preserve today's information.

Children need to connect to their grandparents to learn more about the generation before them that in time they are connected to someone that they know.  When they become older, they will have greater interest to learn more about  family.  They will eventually desire to learn more about the people who were important to their grandparents.  They will then search out the generations that came before namely, great grandparents.

Image via Wikipedia

This year, I created the Facebook page, African Americans of Tangipahoa Parish, Louisiana, to capture the attention of the younger family members.  I already have over 125 family members who have liked the page.  We are developing an online family community.  This is what the Nurturing Our Roots internet radio and television shows are all about.

FB page, African Americans of Tangipahoa Parish, Louisiana

More family history seminars and workshops should be planned for family reunions. We could incorporate activities such as:

• Oral history stations
• Family research and artifacts displays
• Tours to historical family sites

I think a good family reunion should be planned two years in advance so that people can organize themselves.  "It is important to choose the homestead as the site for the family reunion.  If there is any land left, visiting the site can reinforce the emotional ties to the home and the land. Without an emotional tie to the land or home, the ties to the family weaken,"  said Robin Foster.

Its the ties that bind us.  The reunion is the opportunity to form a greater network.  We need to use more wisely the resources in that network. That network forms a larger and stronger community.  Tune in to our weekly broadcast of Nurturing Our Roots internet radio, Sundays at 7pm Central and 8pm Eastern, Tuesdays at 8pm Central and 9pm Eastern, Wednesdays at 8pm Central and 9pm Eastern.

African Americans, Italian immigrants are indebted to the community midwife

Midwife, Mandy Jones Wheat (1892-1977)

Mandy Jones Wheat, the daughter of Joe Jones and Lizzie Banks was born December 15, 1892 in St. Helena Parish, Louisiana.  She was married twice.  Her first husband was Adam Gordon, Sr., and her second husband was Bass Wheat.  As a small child, genealogist, Antoinette Harrell, can remember Mandy as a "church mother" who also attended the old white church with the wooden benches. At first glance, one might think that Mandy, dressed all in white and seated with her cane, was sleeping, but as Antoinette recounts, she was paying attention, watching, and listening and would not say anything until service was over and as you walked by, she would gently stick out her cane to stop those who had been talking to correct them (All photographs shared by grandson, Michael Daniel).

I wonder what it must have felt like to look out over that congregation and remember that she birthed so many generations between 1930 and 1960 into the world.  Mandy was a midwife for at least thirty years.  Not only was she a midwife who delivered thousands of babies, but she was also a herbalist and healer in her community during the days when African Americans and Italian immigrants were not allowed to be treated in hospitals.

Antoinette first became curious about Mandy after interviewing her son, Bishop Willie K. Gordon, Sr. who shared what he could remember of her.  Fortunately, Antoinette felt a deep desire to learn more about Mandy especially because the story of the midwife is most often neglected by researchers.  "This is noteworthy history that would otherwise go unmentioned. How could you not talk about the midwife who did so much to bring lives into the world?" said Antoinette.  She could not find any records to document Mandy, so she posted what she had gathered from Gordon on Facebook.   Miraculously, Michael Daniel saw the post and responded that Mandy was his grandmother.

We are far from reaching the fullest potential of Facebook for genealogical research.  Hopefully, we can learn from the successful ways the Antoinette uses it to locate extended family and share her many research finds while in the field (Follow Antoinette on Facebook).  Antoinette called Michael and met with him at the Amite Branch Public Library where he shared a wealth of photos and midwife records of Mandy Jones Wheat.

Mandy delivered some of her grandchildren and thousands of other African Americans and children of immigrant Italians.  She would walk to their homes if they did not come to get her by mule pulled wagons.  She would stay at the homes of those she assisted sometimes for great lengths of time providing care.

Mandy rarely had a quite moment because she also tended those who were sick, and she was the only person in the area where people could find care.  "Mandy understood the herbs that it took to heal. She saved many lived with her wisdom and knowledge about herbs, tree bark, and tonics," said Antoinette Harrell.

Historical home of Mandy Jones Wheat in Amite, LA

Michael Daniel shared the fact that even after hospitals started treating African Americans, the community still kept going to Mandy because of the trust she had established during her many years of dedicated service.  It is important to understand as well that while Mandy was a very prosperous landowner, the community could not always pay her for her service using money.  They bartered using chickens and other items.  They were good neighbors who learned how to live and survive with each other using what they had.

During times when her family had little, she kept them from going without.  She was a female black farmer who owned her land and grew everything.  She raised livestock and grew fresh vegetables.  She  knew how to preserve meats and would call her family to "come down to d'house.  We got something," recalled her grandson, Eugene Edwards.  She would have smoked beef for them.   He remembers his grandmother giving his family their first cow.

Cow named Lillie Bell on Mandy Jones Wheat's place

She as affectionately called D'Mandy because of her dialect.  She would often use the letter "d" in front of words.  According to her grandson, Michael, this was a mixture of the English and Creole languages.  Michael shared his appreciation for the work Antoinette is doing to share the history of midwives, "I am glad someone is trying to preserve this history" which occurred at a time where African Americans and Italian immigrants could not find healthcare.  Michael's mother, Ruby Wheat Daniel, is the daughter of Mandy and also the person who kept the photographs and history before it was passed to Michael.  It was Ruby who taught her mother to read.

Ruby Wheat Daniel, shared by son, Michael Daniel

Michael even remembers some of the things he was given by his grandmother when he was sick:

• boiled pine tree sprouts mixed with honey and lemon (colds)
• bolied roots
• boiled corn shucks

Stay tuned to this blog to learn more about Mandy Jones Wheat and other unearthed history. Also, be sure to join us for an upcoming Nurturing Our Roots BlogTalkRadio Show on April 12 where two grandsons of Mandy Jones Wheat will discuss the legacy of this prominent midwife.



If anyone knows the names of any of the people who Mandy Jones Weeks birthed or treated please contact us: 
Antoinette Harrell  504-858-4658
                             afrigenah@yahoo.com